Why is so much pressure put on people with disabilities to be like everyone else?

Because it's the status quo. You have to be able to keep up or you get left behind. Independence is a *good* thing. It's better they learn that in school growing up rather than when they turn 18 and get thrown out into the world and all of a sudden they are woefully unprepared to function in society. It's a fact of life that society as a whole has little time or tolerance for those who can't hack it, I'm not saying it's right or wrong, but it's just the way things are.